I know it’s been awhile. Things have been crazy here in terms of trying to keep up with getting ahead of this virus. All of Ro’s favorite science podcasts have PSAs about proper hand washing. Even B’s grandpa was finally convinced that things are not normal or safe for him.
I’ve been hesitating on keeping up this blog because it felt like I needed to have ideas and pictures or make my posts more full. Honestly, I really want to have a two-way conversation to make sure everything is okay with the people I care about. I’ve been waiting for the all clear and I don’t think it’ll ever happen. Each time I think about calling, I start to cry.
It’s not being sensitive. It’s feeling alone. A lot of things changed after I had Ro. I started to be more afraid of driving in the dark or walking alone on a street. But even more so now, there are very few people I feel like I can trust to not leave. I’ve gotten so tired of being blindesided that it’s hard to fight back. That’s probably the main reason why this virus thing has me afraid. I’m not afraid of getting sick but of not knowing I have it and being responsible for getting others sick.
Ro had his first dental cleaning at the end of February. We didn’t have time to do anything other than go to the dentist and have lunch at Rusty’s Pizza. He did really well for being alone in a room with strangers. He was mostly really excited about the new toothbrush the dentist gave him.
I had an interview for a supervisor position first thing in the morning before the dentist appointment. It went okay. I had the whole drive down right afterwards, time during the cleaning, time getting a filling, and time driving back to Fresno to think about all the things I could have done better. I’ve since gotten my feedback and it was as I had expected. I’ll do better next time. Next time, I don’t think I will go to Bakersfield for a dentist appointment without having time to have lunch with a friend first.
I’m currently writing this while waiting for my friend to have her surgery at an outpatient center in Fresno. She’s had a pretty tough year. We usually have Christmas Day dinner at her house and she had to cancer. She had developed a bleeding ulcer that she was feeling the effects from since last November and couldn’t get it diagnosed until Her third ER visit on New Years Day. The doctor kept trying to tell her it was just back pain and shuffled her out with a prescription for ibuprofen — which worsens stomach issues, right? Later after that, she got a sore on her nose checked out and found out she had skin cancer. She had one surgery already to get it removed and they found out the didn’t remove the whole tumor. Hopefully, the finish the job with today’s surgery.
I had asked to take today off from work anyways, but they told us to work from home if we had anything to work on. All of us have investigations or can review each others’ investigations. I brought up that the cloud security might not be reliable, but I guess it’s reliable enough since we’re not working on anything HIPAA sensitive at the moment.
I’m actually in the middle of transferring from Reedley to Huron. My Reedley boss is letting us take the mornings at home to complete our desk work, and call before heading in for the afternoon for phytosanitary inspections. District offices are closed to the public anyways. One of my Reedley coworkers went home yesterday after an internal battle about choosing between keeping herself and daughter safe (she has Lupus) and letting down the team. We all talked her into going home.
I heard that my new Huron supervisor (who actually was my previous supervisor in Reedley) isn’t letting anyone work from home. I can’t help wondering if she thinks this whole this isn’t serious. I hope she follows the rules and at least shuts down the office to the public. I guess I won’t find out until I get there.
B’s still doing okay at his job. His office is no long officiating marriages, but he says that business hasn’t died down at all. He’s considering shutting down passport operations. I asked if setting up appointments would help with the flow, but he doesn’t think it would.
Mom and my stepdad were supposed to come down to visit next week. The airlines are still insisting that she needs to show up in San Francisco for a one day training with fewer than ten other people. Instead of flying they’re driving for the day and then turning around and going back without even having a chance to visit Ev.
I hope Ev is okay. She and Ricardo are probably fine being holed up with cable tv and video games. I just know that Ev doesn’t like admitting her loneliness or when she needs help. She started up an Instagram account and has started posting more often. I’ll try calling later. I’ll try calling my Illinois aunt, too. They at least seem pretty well informed by spending most of their time on Facebook.
That’s all I really have for now. I’ll try to post more as things change.
I love you and miss you.
I’ve been hesitating on keeping up this blog because it felt like I needed to have ideas and pictures or make my posts more full. Honestly, I really want to have a two-way conversation to make sure everything is okay with the people I care about. I’ve been waiting for the all clear and I don’t think it’ll ever happen. Each time I think about calling, I start to cry.
It’s not being sensitive. It’s feeling alone. A lot of things changed after I had Ro. I started to be more afraid of driving in the dark or walking alone on a street. But even more so now, there are very few people I feel like I can trust to not leave. I’ve gotten so tired of being blindesided that it’s hard to fight back. That’s probably the main reason why this virus thing has me afraid. I’m not afraid of getting sick but of not knowing I have it and being responsible for getting others sick.
Ro had his first dental cleaning at the end of February. We didn’t have time to do anything other than go to the dentist and have lunch at Rusty’s Pizza. He did really well for being alone in a room with strangers. He was mostly really excited about the new toothbrush the dentist gave him.
I had an interview for a supervisor position first thing in the morning before the dentist appointment. It went okay. I had the whole drive down right afterwards, time during the cleaning, time getting a filling, and time driving back to Fresno to think about all the things I could have done better. I’ve since gotten my feedback and it was as I had expected. I’ll do better next time. Next time, I don’t think I will go to Bakersfield for a dentist appointment without having time to have lunch with a friend first.
I’m currently writing this while waiting for my friend to have her surgery at an outpatient center in Fresno. She’s had a pretty tough year. We usually have Christmas Day dinner at her house and she had to cancer. She had developed a bleeding ulcer that she was feeling the effects from since last November and couldn’t get it diagnosed until Her third ER visit on New Years Day. The doctor kept trying to tell her it was just back pain and shuffled her out with a prescription for ibuprofen — which worsens stomach issues, right? Later after that, she got a sore on her nose checked out and found out she had skin cancer. She had one surgery already to get it removed and they found out the didn’t remove the whole tumor. Hopefully, the finish the job with today’s surgery.
I had asked to take today off from work anyways, but they told us to work from home if we had anything to work on. All of us have investigations or can review each others’ investigations. I brought up that the cloud security might not be reliable, but I guess it’s reliable enough since we’re not working on anything HIPAA sensitive at the moment.
I’m actually in the middle of transferring from Reedley to Huron. My Reedley boss is letting us take the mornings at home to complete our desk work, and call before heading in for the afternoon for phytosanitary inspections. District offices are closed to the public anyways. One of my Reedley coworkers went home yesterday after an internal battle about choosing between keeping herself and daughter safe (she has Lupus) and letting down the team. We all talked her into going home.
I heard that my new Huron supervisor (who actually was my previous supervisor in Reedley) isn’t letting anyone work from home. I can’t help wondering if she thinks this whole this isn’t serious. I hope she follows the rules and at least shuts down the office to the public. I guess I won’t find out until I get there.
B’s still doing okay at his job. His office is no long officiating marriages, but he says that business hasn’t died down at all. He’s considering shutting down passport operations. I asked if setting up appointments would help with the flow, but he doesn’t think it would.
Mom and my stepdad were supposed to come down to visit next week. The airlines are still insisting that she needs to show up in San Francisco for a one day training with fewer than ten other people. Instead of flying they’re driving for the day and then turning around and going back without even having a chance to visit Ev.
I hope Ev is okay. She and Ricardo are probably fine being holed up with cable tv and video games. I just know that Ev doesn’t like admitting her loneliness or when she needs help. She started up an Instagram account and has started posting more often. I’ll try calling later. I’ll try calling my Illinois aunt, too. They at least seem pretty well informed by spending most of their time on Facebook.
That’s all I really have for now. I’ll try to post more as things change.
I love you and miss you.
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