We had a crazy busy last couple of weeks.
Ro was starting to get kind of clingy and the week before Thanksgiving. He told me that he really didn't want to go to school or daycare. I told him that if he was good, he didn't have to go to daycare for the rest of the week. My mom and stepdad then visited starting on Wednesday and drove Ro to my sister Ev and brother-in-law Ricardo's house that Friday. It was a fairly uneventful visit, which means it must have been a good visit.
Things are still awkward to hang out with them because we still have to b-s- things to talk about together. I'm not sure why this is. Maybe it's because they have a more idealized memory about what it was like to raise kids -- so we don't really know how to talk about raising kids together because in their minds Ro is always acting out instead of just being a kid. One of the days they were visiting, they said they took Ro to the park four times in one day, and, at one point, Ro requested alone time watching cartoons. B and I were wondering if he just wanted them to get off his back and leave him alone. Maybe it's because they don't really ask us any questions about what is going on in our lives. I mean, they know that I'm in a band where my mere presence brings down the average age about twenty years (I'm not sure if that's an exaggeration.), but they don't ask how it goes or even when the concert is. It may be that they quickly can realize that the concert is in December and there would be no way for them to travel then. I've never taken it personally when any of my parents can't visit in December since everyone usually made an effort so visit us each month and it makes sense to visit the farther family during larger holidays. That's also just how it's always been.
Mom did remind me about using pre-made curry paste from the Asian grocery store. I don't think Ro will be interested in having much curry in the future (this paste is pretty spicy), but maybe I'll make it on another date night.
On Saturday, B and I had to stick around Fresno long enough to hand the check over to the installers to get the solar panels installed on Saturday morning. The install was supposed to take 5-6 hours. B periodically checked using the Doorbell camera, but we joked around that the installers just installed one panel where we could see it and spent the rest of the day drinking beer on the roof because no one would be able to see them.
Then, B and I left to meet B's mom and grandfather for lunch at Guisti's in Walnut Grove and wine tasting in Lodi. B's family loves going to Guisti's. B's grandpa says that he and B's grandma started going there for We used to go to Lodi for a few years to check out the Sandhill Crane Festival with Ro. This was the first year we went without him. Guisti's was good as usual. The boat dock is really pretty now with the wild grape vines and fig trees full of fruit. We just tasted wine and cider at Scotto's in Lodi. I'm starting to think that I don't really like wine tasting. I always am tempted to drink a lot all at once because I want to try everything. B also never really likes the selections I make because I like to taste the weird cider flavors. (Hey, that mango jalapeno flavored one was pretty good.)
By the time B's mom and grandfather left to beat the traffic home, we went to settle in at a room we rented for the night at the very cute a Bella Vino Bed and Breakfast in Lodi. Unfortunately, the owners didn't check their notifications and we had to wait for awhile. I really had to use the bathroom and was still tipsy from the wine tasting and I abandoned B with the bags on their porch. My objective was to use the bathroom at the Jack In the Box on the corner, but you could read the signs from outside saying the bathrooms were out of service. I then walked a bit further and ended up getting my eyebrows threaded (well, it had been awhile and they were out of control) to use their bathroom. I walked back to the B&B when I was done and met B back inside the house. After checking out our clean room and bathroom, B thought it would be fun to go to a real diner. He led us to the Richmaid Restaurant. It was almost like eating in the midwest and they served the same Broaster Chicken that they serve at Smitty's in Leonore, IL. The rest of the night was pretty uneventful since we wanted to sit and read in bed.
The next morning, we had a nice breakfast with the B&B owners. They told stories about the different groups they had stay at the house since they took over the business last May. They had also suggested that we check out a panaderia in Thornton, but we ended up not having time to go because we didn't feel like eating again so soon. After exploring the Cosumnes River Preserve, we drove to pick up Ro from Livermore. We found out he had been spending the last few days watching all of the old seasons of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, playing with TMNT toys that they own, and drawing pictures of pizza while waiting for Ricardo to pick up pizza for them to eat. Not sure about what else had happened. When they watched him in October, Ricardo said Ro explained anti-gravity to him: "You know, it's like gravity, but opposite." Both Ev and Ricardo said that Ro was good and they all had fun. Ev and Ricardo also said that they hadn't been up to anything new lately and things are same old, same old. I admit that I don't spend a lot of time talking to them because they also don't seem as interested in talking. Our timing worked out badly that day to where we couldn't have lunch together, and they've usually said that they weren't hungry any other time that I offered to pick something up. We then drove to Los Banos and ate at Hot City BBQ (a usual lunch stop) on the way home. Ro has been having a lot of accidents in the car lately, and he had one just before we reached the restaurant. I think he fell asleep after that on the way home.
Thanksgiving week was also eventful. Ro only went to daycare and B's mom's house because he didn't have preschool. When we enrolled Ro into preschool, the administrators told us we would have to submit a transfer form when it was time for him to go to transitional-kindergarten. The deadline was December 2nd to turn in the form, but, when I called the the transfer office, they said he didn't need a form because he was already a DI kid (DI: Dual Immersion; not DeIonized water...Well, I thought it was funny.).
We spent Thanksgiving Day at B's mom's house with B's grandfather. She had a really nice spread with a cheeseball with crackers, steak, ham, turkey, mashed potatoes, gravy, cranberry sauce, green beans, pumpkin pie, and apple pie. Everyone had a blast. B had fun reminiscing with his family. I made the mistake of drinking super super strong coffee around 3pm and my stomach was feeling really bad by the time we arrived for dinner. I felt bad about not being able to eat, and we couldn't take home the leftovers because we weren't done with our eating journey.
We managed to avoid going shopping on Black Friday this year, but we did have dinner with another part of B's family (aunt, grandpa, great-aunt, and great-uncle) at Parma Ristorante where we had our wedding dinner. I sat near B's great-aunt C and great-uncle J. Great-uncle J is B's grandmother's twin brother. B and his aunt were able to show super old pictures of the family to J that had been posted online by other family members in a branch that had been disconnected from this one for at least two generations. C and I talked about books for awhile. She told me she had just finished Where the Crawdads Sing by Della Owens, and both she and J really loved the book. Ironically, I had just checked that book out from the library because my Meetup group had read it for their October book club. Ro was pretty restless for dinner. I think we might have to give up trying to take him to Parma because the one time we took him before that was a disaster as well. The food was really really good as usual.
There was a point in the conversation where J stated that a really big pet peeve of his was when people are looking at their phones instead of conversing when going out to a restaurant. C suggested that there may have been something important that each person needed to deal with immediately. J thought that they usually didn't seem distressed enough for whatever issue to seem that important. I suggested that all the people at the table were super boring and couldn't come up with anything to talk about. I told them about how I had wanted to be the parent that didn't let their kid use electronics at the table, but I found myself doing it out of desperation. Of course, we're talking as Ro is moving back and forth from my end of the table to B's end of the table because he was full and bored already.
On Saturday morning, we drove to Tehachapi to meet up with our Polish family friends. Anna and Andy were visiting from Houston and were heading back to the airport that night. Anna's little brother D was already vacationing in Kiev and couldn't make it back for Thanksgiving. We noticed from Anna's mom's coffee table books that he spends a lot of time traveling now with his airline job as a controller. I think most of Anna's pictures with him are when she catches him out on a trip. The drive to Tehachapi was pretty uneventful. Anna had mentioned that it was snowing on Thanksgiving, but Hwy 58 was completely clear and open by the time we left to go.
Anna and Andy made lunch for everyone and just when we thought we were done eating and drinking, there was tea, cookies, eggnog, wine, persimmons, and lattes to drink. I got Ro excited about going to see snow before we left, but as soon as we got inside the house, it started to rain/hail/slurry pretty hard. Anna's parents gave Ro a Hot Wheels car transporter filled with Hot Wheels cars, and so he was set to be occupied during the whole visit.
At one point of the conversation, Anna and Andy talked about all the kids throwing fits during plane rides. Anna mentioned that she would get more irritated when she didn't see the parents attempting to quiet their kids. I told her that they're usually not doing anything because they gave up. There's not really much you can do as a parent on a plane since you can't even stand up half the time. We ended up going off on a tangent talking about eating with kids. I mentioned that thing before about letting Ro use my phone during dinner. We all wondered if it's just a sign of the time. Why try using old tricks like toys when you know that a cell phone will work for sure? Would parents raising kids twenty years ago complaining about how kids can't stop using devices have jumped at the chance to entertain their kids if they were acting up in public? Even Anna's mom wasn't sure of the answer to that one, but she mentioned that there was a family next to theirs while Anna and D were growing up that made the conscious decision to not have any screens in the house. Those people will probably exist in every culture though.
The rain finally let up just before we left, and Ro had a chance to make his snow angel.
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| Ro had to make his snow angel face down because the snowflakes were stinging. |
Sunday morning was a mochi making day, but B was vomiting and had diarrhea. We had a hard time trying to figure out what could have caused his illness since we ate mostly the same food except for McDonald's. I don't think we'll be eating food from McDonald's for awhile. I took Ro to make mochi without B. I thought Ro would have fun putting the fillings into mochi, but I should have known better. We washed his hands well, but he didn't like the looks of the dough when it came out of the machine. I sat at a table talking to another one of the church goers while Ro played with some of the other kids. There are a pair of twins who are a month younger than Ro and love to play together whenever they meet. One of the other ladies filling mochi with anko gave Ro a super fresh piece without any filling. Usually, Ro does like mochi because the texture is too gummy. Ro ate it all up only complaining about the stickiness on his hands when he was done.
When we got home, B was still sort of dying, but we needed to leave for Sacramento that evening. B finally felt a little bit better around 5pm. Ro and I had a chance to finish packing and clean the house a little bit before leaving. Ro also had some time to decorate for Christmas since we knew we wouldn't have as much time to decorate when we came back from Sacramento. We had arranged for this trip since B would be attending a work conference, and I just needed a break from work. Lately, I have been feeling very unproductive at work. I'm sure a part of it had been from feeling burnt out, and I've just been tired from covering for my boss while he was on vacation. I was really looking forward to this trip, but I'm going to save that story for the next post.
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